“I met MR 7 years ago this August. We became fast friends even though we were opposite in a lot of ways. I was raised the oldest of 7 children, constantly surrounded by babies, birth and breastfeeding and she was an only child who never even had a second thought about those things. I desperately wanted to be a mother since I could remember and M wanted nothing to do with it. We spent 2 years of our friendship doing lots of fun road trips with our husbands, playing games late into the night and having each other for dinner and wine. During many of our late night talks, M and her husband let us know that they were never going to have children. They liked their freedom, they didn’t want to bring life into a broken world, plus they just didn’t have any desire at all. I got pregnant with my first son and was ecstatic. M was curious. She asked me all sorts of questions and seemed pretty interested in everything I was learning about having babies. The day I had my son (after a long 50 hour labor), she and her husband brought us celebratory beer and she held my B for the first time. A change came over her immediately. Just about a year later, M found out she was pregnant. It wasn’t planned and I was scared for her! She didn’t seem the motherly type, and I could not imagine them giving up their high paced lifestyle to parent a little one.
Early on, M read Hypnobirthing the Mongan Method and started listening to pregtastic podcasts. I was shocked at her excitement to have this baby and was delighted as she spent her 9 months of pregnancy active and healthy and just glowing with pure joy. She loved being pregnant. She was mentally strong and physically strong and she never wavered in letting stories of pregnancy ailments get to her.
With my one experience under my belt being a long overdue, long labor, I was trying to prepare her for the disappointment of having your due date come and go. The day before her due date, I left to go out of town for the weekend. About 12 hours later I got a phone call that she was in labor! I was so bummed out that we wouldn’t be there to welcome that baby with celebratory beer and that I wouldn’t be there to talk through her birth story with her.
Just a few hours later I received a picture on my phone with a picture of a radiant Monique holding a beautiful newborn A. That picture kept me up all night. I would toss and turn and then just look at the picture again. Such joy and confidence filled her face. Not a hint of fear.
As soon as I got home I headed over to hold the baby and get the details on the birth story, I was also planning on “helping out” since I was sure she was overwhelmed with a crying newborn at this point. M hadn’t even changed a diaper before she had A so I was sure my “expertise” would be needed. I walked into a room with a confident mommy and a peaceful sleeping A. M told me her birth story with ease and fondness. She used the phrases, “It wasn’t painful!” and “I laughed when I was pushing” and “It was like a party!”. I couldn’t believe my ears! Here a woman without any exposure to birth previously, had learned to trust her own body and had a relatively painless birth!
Two and a half months later, a surprised M called me with the news that she was pregnant again! She continued this pregnancy like the last, even running up to the last days of her pregnancy. This go around she had asked me to be in the room and to take pictures of the labor and birth. I was curious. I had already begun my birth photography business and had photographed many painful labors (many ending in epidural), and in the back of my head I didn’t quite believe M stories of her first birth. The truth would be exposed. When she called me and told me she was in labor, I went to her house where I watched her laugh, finish cooking up some soup, sway and dance. We headed to the hospital not when she was crying in pain but just when she felt like it. In the dark of the night I watched her in her self hypnosis quietly and beautifully sit still during contractions with a pleasant smile on her face. After contractions she would continue her conversations in such a normal manner. There was never once a sound uttered or a “I can’t do this” spoken. Around 9.5 cm she fell asleep! I was in awe! So her stories were true! She really wasn’t feeling pain. That night beautiful R was born and joined her family and her sister who wasn’t even walking yet.
I learned a lot that night watching M deliver her second baby. I witnessed the strength that M had in her mind and how that affected her attitude not only during birth but throughout her pregnancy and parenting. She was never once scared but just accepted birth as a normal beautiful thing. Consequently M describes her labors as relatively painless.

Book Synopsis(from the author’s web page):

The Gift of Giving Life: Rediscovering the Divine Nature of Pregnancy and Birth offers something that no other book has before–a spiritual look at pregnancy, birth and mothering by and for LDS women and other women of faith.

The Gift of Giving Life does not advocate for any one type of birth or approach to prenatal care, rather it intends to unify families and communities in regard to the sacredness of birth. We also aim to provide you with resources, information, and inspiration that you may not have had access to all in one place before.

We have been commanded to “multiply and replenish the earth,” but with this commandment we were also given a reason: that we might have joy. We hope that this book brings peace, joy, and comfort to families everywhere.

As a self proclaimed student of LDS birthing culture, I read this book with a sense of familiarity.  Among the many discussions, interviews, and shared birth stories I have had with LDS women, the sense of a connection to a Heavenly Mother and the divine has always been apparent to me.  No matter what choices these women have made, it is usually done in connection with the idea that birth and giving birth is sacred and often surrounded by rituals that provide LDS women with a sense of closeness to God.  These include things such as prayer, song, meditation, blessings, and reverence for motherhood.

A few years ago, I recieved a question from one of my readers asking any advice in navagating the Mormon Mommy Culture when your plan is outside the mainstream, and how she could find common ground.  I answered with some of the above thoughts of prayer or blessings, but this book answers this question far better than I could.  It discusses common doctrine believed among the LDS faith that may unite them, as well as interesting intellectual discussions on the meaning of life, birth, death, and motherhood.  With stories and essays, it provides an insiders look into some of the dilemmas and questions inherent in following a faith and working to find meaning in our birth experiences that is common to all women.

This book compiles and completes many of the concepts I have discussed and written in the past, and provides a framework from which both birth workers and birthing mothers can begin to understand the sacred event, regardless of the choices made, that birth is among many LDS women.

Earn 3 Free Bonus Gifts when you buy a copy of The Gift of Giving Life by May 15th.  Just visit The Gift of Giving Life to find out the details!

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“I feel that every women has the right to be supported throughout all phases
of the birth process. That she should eb allowed to enjoy her child coming
into the world and that having a douls beside her supporting her helps that
become a reality. She should be reasuured and made to felt safe and
confident in her ability. A doula provides individualized care for the
mothers (not the generic hospital care) specific prefrences and
circumstances.

I hope that as a doula I am able to instill a sence of calm, understanding
and confidence in my clients. I want to allow the mother to make fully
informed choices that coinside with her wishes and beliefs. To empower them
to embrace thier strength, show their spirit and believe in their bodies.  I
would like to help women and their partners  enjoy the birth of their child.” -M

From Helen:

“The first time I gave birth, I thought I was prepared.  I had hired a midwife, taken natural birthing classes and had read a lot of birth stories and books.  In the throws of a very long two day labor, I felt alone and like I was dying.  My midwife was off delivering other babies, my nurse was charting the whole time and my husband was doing the best he could.  Not only did I fear something was wrong and that I was dying, but I was robbed of the joy of letting my body birth and not being afraid.

My number one goal as a doula is to constantly affirm my birthing mothers that what they are going through is normal, that there isn’t something wrong.  I also want to help partners feel included and harness their nervous energy into positive affirmation and helpfulness towards the mother.  I want the mother to feel like they are fully surrounded by people who believe in her and who care for her.  In the end, I want my mothers to come away from whatever birth they had feeling empowered and that they were able to make informed decisions regarding their birth.”

I just sat down to preview this for the showing.  I was a bit apprehensive before watching this film, because I thought it might undermine women’s legitimate choice or desire to also choose a hospital or cesarean birth.  But it didn’t.   It is about working to allow women the right to choose home birth as well as other choices.  It obviously favors home birth, but it also acknowledges that it’s okay for women to make other choices, and that it is the ability to make a choice that is valued.  It is, in fact, advocating for women to have choices, period.  This is something I am very much in line with.

I also loved the experts they chose to interview.  It includes well known childbirth advocates, such as Ina May Gaskin, Michel Odent, and Robbie Davis-Floyd, but it also includes some very articulate and intelligent midwives that helped to provide a whole range of information on childbirth choices.

The stories from women were also very touching and filled with raw emotion.  It is obvious from these interviews, the impact choice can have on a birth, be it homebirth or in the hospital.  They very accurately show the difficulty present when a women is wanting to choose something that is not culturally mainstream and the effect it can have on a woman and how they feel about themselves and the experience.

This is a great movie to watch for those who are wanting to understand the choices that are available and the effect that taking away choices has.

We will continue to offer the option of early course completion, which for the ambitious student affords her the opportunity to graduate in less than one year’s time. This allows a student to pay only for those months in which she was taking the course.  So for example, if it takes only 9 months for the student to complete the course then the student only pays for nine months’ registration fees to complete graduation.  We do not anticipate ever taking this option away.

In the meantime, any registrations processed before Friday morning, March 22, 2013, when we make the switch (probably around 9 A.M. Mountain Standard Time – Arizona) will be grandfathered in at the former price for the length of the course.

Ever wonder what the differences were between the different types of midwives?  I’ve pulled together some info to help you  in figuring that out.  Hopefully this will help when choosing which care provider to work with.

Midwifery Certification

Certified Midwife (CM)

The American College of Nurse Midwives (2010) states:

CMs are individuals who have or receive a background in a health related field other than nursing and graduate from a midwifery education program accredited by ACME. Graduates of an ACME-accredited midwifery education program take the same national certification examination as CNMs but receive the professional designation of certified midwife.

CMs can practice in New Jersey, New York, Rhode Island, Delaware, and Missouri (American College of Nurse Midwives, 2011).

Certified Nurse Midwife (CNM)

The American College of Nurse Midwives (2010) states:

CNMs are registered nurses who have graduated from a nurse-midwifery education program accredited by the Accreditation Commission for Midwifery Education (ACME) and have passed a national certification examination to receive the professional designation of certified nurse-midwife. CNMs can practice anywhere in the United States.

Certified Professional Midwife (CPM)

The Midwives Alliance of North America (2012) states:

A Certified Professional Midwife is a knowledgeable, skilled and professional independent midwifery practitioner who has met the standards for certification set by the North American Registry of Midwives (NARM) and is qualified to provide the midwifery model of care. The CPM is the only international credential that requires knowledge about and experience in out-of-hospital settings.

CPM’s are regulated in some states, but not all. Check here for up to date info on state regulations: http://mana.org/statechart.html.

Direct Entry Midwife (DEM)

The Midwives Alliance of North America (2012) states:

A direct-entry midwife is an independent practitioner educated in the discipline of midwifery through self-study, apprenticeship, a midwifery school, or a college- or university-based program distinct from the discipline of nursing. A direct-entry midwife is trained to provide the Midwives Model of Care to healthy women and newborns throughout the childbearing cycle primarily in out-of-hospital settings.

DEMs are regulated by the states. Some require lisensure and some don’t. Check here for up to date info on state regulations: http://mana.org/statechart.html.

Lay Midwife

The Midwives Alliance of North America (2012) states:

The term “Lay Midwife” has been used to designate an uncertified or unlicensed midwife who was educated through informal routes such as self-study or apprenticeship rather than through a formal program. This term does not necessarily mean a low level of education, just that the midwife either chose not to become certified or licensed, or there was no certification available for her type of education (as was the fact before the Certified Professional Midwife credential was available). Other similar terms to describe uncertified or unlicensed midwives are traditional midwife, traditional birth attendant, granny midwife and independent midwife.

Check here for up to date info on state regulations: http://mana.org/statechart.html.

Liscensed Midwife (LM)

The Midwives Alliance of North America (2012) states:

A licensed midwife is a midwife who is licensed to practice in a particular jurisdiction (usually a state or province).

Check here for up to date info on state regulations: http://mana.org/statechart.html.

References

American College of Nurse Midwives. (2010). Our Credentials. Retrieved from http://www.midwife.org/About—American-College-of-Nurse-Midwives

American College of Nurse Midwives. (2011). Comparison of Certified Nurse-Midwives, Certified Midwives, and Certified Professional Midwives Clarifying the distinctions among professional midwifery credentials in the U.S.. Retrieved from http://www.midwife.org/ACNM/files/ccLibraryFiles/Filename/000000001385/CNM%20CM%20CPM%20ComparisonChart%20082511.pdf

Midwives Alliance of North America. (2012). Definitions. Retrieved from

http://mana.org/definitions.html#DEM

Midwives Alliance of North America. (2012). Direct-Entry Midwifery State-by-State Legal Status.

Retrieved from http://mana.org/statechart.html

CONTACS (COmmunity NeTwork for ACcessing Shelter)

This service provides help in locating an emergency, homeless, or domestic violence shelter in Maricopa County. When you make the call, the operator will provide current information about available emergency and transitional beds in Maricopa County.

SHELTER HOTLINE

(602) 263-8900 or 1-800-799-7739
24 hours a day, seven days a week
Voice & TTY

The Warm Line

The Warm Line provides supportive, confidential telephone services for persons feeling overwhelmed or just needing to talk. The Warm Line is a friendly telephone support line operated by trained call specialists who offer non-judgmental peer support and actively listen to callers’ concerns, understanding the callers’ perspectives because we’ve also experienced behavioral health issues.

1-602.347.1100

Available Monday – Friday: from 12pm – midnight and Saturday, Sunday: 4pm – midnight. They’re open on holidays.

LA Leche League of Arizona

La Leche League of Arizona offers free mother-to-mother support for women who choose to breastfeed via our Valley Help Line and Monthly Meetings. Membership is not a requirement to receive help or attend a meeting.

Helpline: 602 234-1956

Website where you can find meeting times and places: http://www.freewebs.com/lllofaz/phoenixmetroarea.htm

Arizona Coalition Against Domestic Violence

The Arizona Coalition Against Domestic Violence was formed in 1980 so that concerned citizens and professionals could unite through this state-wide organization to: increase public awareness about the issue of Domestic Violence, enhance the safety of and services for Domestic Violence victims, and reduce the incidence of Domestic Violence in Arizona families. Since its inception, the Coalition has served as an advocate and a voice representing the needs of domestic violence service providers and the victims they serve throughout Arizona. The Coalition has, and will continue to, educate the public about Domestic Violence.

If you are scared and you need to talk call 602-279-2900 or 1-800-782-6400

Office Hours: 8:30am – 5:00pm M-F

Scottsdale Healthcare Community Health Services

Scottsdale Healthcare partners with community members and local businesses, working together to create a healthier Northeast Valley.

Services offered

Free children’s immunization clinics

Infant CPR

Empowering Parents and Kidz Lecture Series, Oh, baby!

Preemie Playgroup

Breast Feeding Support Services

Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support Group

For up-to-date information on times and places visit: http://www.shc.org/Medical+Services/Pediatric+Services/Patient+Education+%26+Resources/Patient+Education+and+Resources

Instead, I present a different model of labor.  I’ve outlined the major differences below.  So, while I may still refer to stages in posts, I do so only because it is how labor is understood by most women and care providers.  I do not, however, believe it is an accurate way to describe labor.

Stages of Labor

Labor contains distinct stages.

“True” labor is defined by cervical dilation.

Labor is characterized by a steady increase in

dilation.

Labor and birth can be predicted by how far

dilated a mother is and how often they are

contracting.

Your body should follow the curve regardless of

emotional aspects.

Cervical dilation gives you the ability to

determine when a woman should deliver.

A pathologic labor is one in which it is not

dilating at a specific speed.

All women follow the same pattern.

 Progressive Model of Labor

Labor has very indistinct starts and stops.

Cervical dilation is only one of the signs of

progression.

Labor is characterized by plateaus and hills of

progress.

Labor and birth are unpredictable

Emotional aspects play a role in the ability to

progress.

Specific signs (including cervical dilation) are an

indicator of progress, though cannot determine the

length of labor.

A pathologic labor is one in which either mother

or baby is in distress.

Each woman has a unique labor pattern.